Drops of AmusementToo Much Praise 2
Here are some more startling findings regarding praising kids: Apparently, youngsters see right through parents' and teachers' efforts at instilling them with self-esteem through praise.
- Only very young kids (age 7 and under) take praise at face value
- By age 12, children perceive praise from a teacher not as a sign that they did well at something - but that they actually lack sufficient skill at it and require additional encouragement
- Teenaged students discount praise altogether, and consider a teacher's criticism as the only true testament to their abilities to do better. Teens that don't get criticized perceive themselves as having reached their full potential in educators' eyes, however mediocre that potential may be.
In other words, as kids get older they pay attention not to parents' and teachers' words, but to underlying meanings. Hyped-up compliments and encouragement means they need help and emotional bolstering to reach even an average level of achievement, whereas criticism means they have untapped potential for excellence...